Violent Haircut
Our daughter spent her first two years bald; so she was already three when she got her first haircut at the local children’s salon. Once inside, we were immediately sidetracked by the novelties meant to distract. Toys strewn around the waiting area, walls painted bright colors, and hair “bling” hung from the ceiling. Televisions blasted a barrage of cartoons that revved up the kids and made the adults numb. Stylists enlisted a variety of tactics to redirect a wary child’s attention. Bubbles flew through the air, suckers were stuffed into nervous children’s quivering mouths, and fish swam in glass bowls on the counters.

Despite these dizzying amusements, when the scissors came out of the stylists ruffled apron pocket, some children inevitably shrieked as if they were about to be slaughtered. Mothers held fearful children in a vice-like grip while other stylists (waiting for their next heads) cooed and blew bubbles. It was always an overwhelming scene. A little less chaos and a smidgen of calm would have resulted in composed children more willing to get a simple haircut.

The stress of 2008 makes me think of that children’s salon. The year has been full of distractions about the economy and the direction of our country. We are blasted with a 24/7 news cycle that revs us up or numbs us out. More calm and less chaos would be better for us all right now.

Déjà Vu All Over Again?
I recently spoke with a group of 9th graders about stress. Those 14 and 15-year olds nodded in understanding as I spoke of events in the world:
• War protests
• Recession
• Unemployment
• Illegal drugs
• Energy crisis
• Environmental concerns
• Political strife at home and abroad
• The threat of hijackings and terrorism
• An American swimmer winning unprecedented medals at the Olympics

Here’s the catch, I was speaking about the America of the 1970’s when I was in 9th grade. Living through the 1970’s gives me perspective. I know that as stressful as things are right now, the troubles of this time will eventually pass. Better times are ahead.

Get a Grip
The frenzy of our constant news cycle is a distraction that can sidetrack our happiness and make us fearful. Listening to information once is informative; listening over and over is stressful. Share this perspective with your kids. Turn off the media and tune in to some family interaction every day. Involve your kids to brainstorm ways your family can be “scrappy” during these uncertain times. You don’t have to put bricks in the toilet tank to save water like we did in the 70’s, but your kids could help you clip coupons to save on your grocery bill.

Three attitudes help people thrive during stressful times:

Commitment: Being involved rather than giving up
Control: Finding ways to influence the outcome rather than feeling helpless
Challenge: View change as an opportunity to learn new things and find innovative solutions

Build resilience in your family by embracing calm, cutting chaos, and trimming distractions. Keep things in perspective, and teach kids to thrive under stress and minimize fear. That will give them a lifelong advantage. And like a bad haircut remember—this economy will eventually grow!